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Cancer, his part time job  Cancer, his part time job My father was diagnosed with Colerectal Cancer 4 years ago on the day I left to move to the other side of the country. This is a story about his fight and how it brought our family closer together, even with a 2000 km distance. Cancer is a word that you never want to hear, especially when it comes to a loved one. Well the word cancer changed my life forever 4 years ago. In July of 2006 I arrived in Whistler BC from Ontario after my 5 long days on the road and I was excited about starting my new life and then the word cancer changed everything. I got a phone call from my dad, I was sitting in a chair at my sister's place and my dad told me he had cancer. I was in shock. I didn't know what to say. I knew before I left that there was something wrong but I didn't want to believe it was cancer. After I got off the phone I just cried and couldn't stop crying. I tried to act like I was ok and I walked over to my new place, met my landlord. Drove my aunt and uncle to their hotel room and then went for dinner at Tapley's. All the time my siblings and I were trying to pretend that our lives had not just been changed forever. When the 3 of us were by ourselves that night we didn't know what to say, we just wanted to be together.In the days that followed I became determined to find a way to fight this disease. I called in the help of my beautiful friend Tara, a naturopath, for help on knowing exactly what as happening and what he could do to make it better. Over the phone with my parents I went through the treatment and surgery with my dad. I was scared and wanted to go home many times but knew I couldn't because it would not be what was best for me. I did go home once to see him during the first round of chemo and he looked great but it was still so hard to see my strong and powerful father vulnerable and weak. My brother really stepped up to the plate and took great care of them when my parents needed him. This brought my brother closer to my parents because this had always been my job. My sister also became closer to my parents and now speaks to them on the phone more frequently. I am as close as I have always been. We have all found a new level of spirituality which we will keep with us forever. Although I know that my dad would love for me to be in Ontario, he also understands that being out here is what I need. My dad has become an inspiration to me. When we were on the road out here I called him in tears because of a fight we were having with my aunt and uncle, even though he had been told he had cancer on the day that I left he didn't' t tell me because he wanted me to get to BC safely. He let me cry and tell him my problem all the while knowing that he had cancer and I didn't know. He was my dad that day, strong and supportive of me despite the hell he was going through. Through all his treatments he kept a positive attitude. He always says 'I don't have cancer'. He spends his treatment days laughing with and meeting new people. He even has nicknames for his nurses. He is retired so he calls his treatment days his day at work. When the days were long, he calls it overtime. Even though he was going through chemo and radiation, he was always concerned about mom. He didn't want her to be too tired herself, but what he didn't realize was the power my moms love for my dad would give her. He has been taking care of her for years now. After the surgery, she was taking care of him. She surprised all of us. There have only been a few times he has broken down but it only lasted for a couple of days and then he was ready to fight again. I now want to be that strong for him so he can be as proud of me as I am of him. He decided that when the cancer was gone he was going to come out and visit Wendy and I. That is what he talks about now. He also said my sister Wendy and Rich will be getting married in Vegas when he is better. Not sure how they feel about that but it gives me strength to know that he is planning for his life after cancer. So now my family has gone down the cancer path. Now we just keep on living, trying not to think about it ever coming back. So what did this horrible disease cancer do to our family.....it made it better. We are closer and stronger. We know that love can conquer distance and a disease. We have learned how fragile life is and we will never take it for granted ever again. It tried to tear us apart but we are stronger than that. What tried to tear apart our lives only brought us closer together and showed each other our best attributes which we had all taken for granted before. That is what makes the Kendall family true cancer survivors!!!!! So if you are ever told that you or someone you love has cancer, just remember that love and the right attitude will battle and kill this disease. Dad still goes for check ups, just to make sure but he is still a survivor. He is getting slower with age, but still lives life to the fullest. When he came out to Whistler this fall he decided he wanted to come for a hike with Wendy and I and he was awesome. It was challenging and he did it. At times we took breaks but still he kept going. He is now 72 years old and planning for Come Home Year 10 years from now. Mom is even trying to live a healthier life. I have found Reiki which I know will help keep both of them healthy and it is a way that I can help them both from Whistler. Cancer is still something we think about everyday, but it isn't scary anymore because we know how to fight it!!! |
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